


I Got a Random Burst of Energy (My Body's Last Hurrah)

by Freakingoutdontyoumeanfreakingin



Series: Mechanic 'Verse [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: (to the tune of "Believe it or Not it's just me" from Believe It or Not by Joey Scarbury), Kidnapping, YES THEY ARE ALL TEENS THEIR CHILDHOODS WERE ROUGH, believe it or not. they're all teens! bc i said so, im so annoyed at tags, oh shwit i forgot to tag that on the other one, prodigy just goes by prodigy bc he is. a GOD, shhhhhh just read, will's a harpy bc it's complicated okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-11-27 17:41:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20952320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freakingoutdontyoumeanfreakingin/pseuds/Freakingoutdontyoumeanfreakingin
Summary: "Nic is kidnapped again- but not by who you think. This, in turn, makes the villains really mad- Nic is/ may be drugged also Words: reiterate?  conflagration?  induce?  soporific?  anarchy?" -literally what i wrote this from





	I Got a Random Burst of Energy (My Body's Last Hurrah)

Yet again, I’m sitting in a chair. The chair is metal, however, and my ankles are handcuffed to the its legs. I wonder for a moment who had kidnapped me, but come to no viable conclusion. Taking a quick status and perimeter check tells me that there’s no one in the room with me, that I don’t have anything else in the room which looks to be an abandoned warehouse- not sure where- and is bare save for the chair and me. My hands are not restrained, which was stupid of them, whoever they are, my feet are numbing, my head is aching, which is probably due to the drug they used to knock me out, and I am naked except for my underwear and shorts. That part isn't so good, because it means that whoever kidnapped me has AVES.  
“Oh, wait,” I say aloud. “I wasn’t wearing AVES when I left. I was with Con, dropped him off, and went home.” Con was my nephew. He’s eleven, which is apparently an age where you like crazy people. It’d worry me if he hadn’t already proved he could take care of himself. So, that means AVES is at my ‘shop, and Con is with Uncle Thom, so they’re both safe. I try to remember what happened after I dropped Con off, and find to my dismay I cannot. I’m torn from my wandering thoughts when a man barrels through my cell door. He, a massive Afghan hulk of a man covered with tattoos and something red I hope isn’t blood, is escorted by two women who look so terrifying I’m surprised they haven’t killed me already. Seriously, these women look almost as scary as Renata, and I’m pretty sure (89.9% at least) she could unalive me with her thighs. The Afghan man speaks up first, in what I think is Uzbek.  
“Shunday qilib,” he drawls, deep voice set to induce-terror mode. “siz mexaniksiz. Men faxrlanaman.” One of the two ladies, the one with blonde hair cut to her shoulders instead of the one with black hair, speaks up. “So, you’re the mechanic. I’m honored.” She’s a translator, then. The man speaks again. “Men sizga nima qilmoqchi ekanimni bilasiz.” He smirks at me, and it’s a dirty thing. “I bet you’re wondering what I’m going to do to you,” Blondie echoes.  
“Men sizni xushnud etmoqchiman,” says Afghan, and the room fills with dread, almost tangible. “Siz buni men uchun juda oson deb topasiz.” Blondie translates. “I’m going to make you complacent,” Afghan retrieves a small vial from female Dagwood as Blondie finishes. “And you’ll find it’s quite easy for me to do so.” I’m quick, usually, on my feet. Now that gives me nothing. My brain fires on all cylinders, both it and me desperate for escape or rescue, whichever came sooner. I glance around the room, panicking noticeably enough that Tattoos and Bad News feels the need to bark, “Uni ushlab turing” to Blondie and female Dagwood, which apparently means “Restrain him” as that’s what they do. I fight, give me some credit, but I’m already bound and there’s two of them; I’ve got no chance here. Afghan stalks up to my chair, menace of a face in a smug grin. He takes his little syringe out of his pocket, and is it just me or is he drawing this out? He is, obviously, thinking he can toy with me. Afghan sinisterly smiles, and injects me with the syringe. I am quick to deduce the drug he’s using, it seems to be a modified, more fast-acting version of Rohypnol. I know I have about five minutes before I am completely under, so I ask, “What d’ya want frommm mee?” I’m already slurring, that’s not good. Afghan chuckles.  
“Men seni kichkina ko'rishni xohlayman, 'Nic.” Blondie is busy, probably with something behind my back, so female Dagwood takes over. “I want to see you squirm, ‘Nic.” Afghan nods in her general direction.  
“Keyin qurolni xohlayman.” Female Dagwood is off doing another thing, so Blondie replaces her by Afghan’s side. However, female Dagwood speaks again in a voice not dissimilar to knives on metal. “Then, I want you to build me a weapon.” I’m fully aware of my inability to use my mouth correctly by now, but I try anyways.  
“Nooo,” I slur. “I won’ do i’.” Afghan looks livid, for a second, with an anger like a conflagration burning through his eyes and rippling through his bulk. He rears a hand back, and by this point I’m almost on the ground, just barely keeping my head up. I’m almost grateful my shirt isn’t on me, it would be uncomfortable, bunching into my back in this position. Afghan rears his hand back, palm meeting fingernails in a fist, and I wonder if he knows that it’s dangerous to punch with your thumb inside the fist. Apparently he does not, but he punches me in the face anyway. I’m only partly aware of Blondie, female Dagwood and him beating me senseless. I curl into a ball. The beatings continue, seeming to be ceaseless. Then they abruptly stop. I’m grateful, but I don’t know if this is a threat or not, so I stay curled up. Then Tricks’ voice, either Tricks or a sound-alike, says,  
“My dear ‘Nic, I was under the impression these had stopped.” I know I told the Villain League the kidnappings hadn’t happened in a while, but I had only told them. They reacted poorly when I mentioned kidnappings on me in the first place, so I figured no harm no foul so long as it actually stopped. There’s a small noise of displeasure in return for my silence. I uncurl a bit, but my vision is blurry. I can’t quite see them, but I see their outline.  
“Trrricksss?? Tha’ youu?” Tricks looks at me, now aware of where I am. My head feels full of cotton, and I’m swimming in it a bit before I realise Tricks is looking at me.  
“They will pay,” they state. “For what they did to you.” Tricks would sound matter-of-fact to anyone else, but to me their voice is protective fury, with an undercurrent of worry. They look me over, I think. “Are you hurt?” There’s the worry again.  
“Mmm.. ‘m fine Trr’ckss.” I’m still in a state of intoxication, and Tricks is looking me over like he knows I’m lying. I am, and a bruise decorating my face is proof. Tricks gently throws me on their back, and a soporific haze comes over me. Nausea follows it. Tricks says something more, important most likely, but I’m already asleep.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
When I wake up, it’s to the worried faces of the entire Villain League. Tricks is worried, but doing their best to hide it; Mystify is in a small argument with Metallica, anger engraved in both their faces; Tartarus is missing. I look around a bit, and notice I’m on a couch. It’s a nice couch, all plump and soft. Its niceness almost makes me forget about the anarchy of the room I’m in. I clear my throat, and they all stop talking and direct their attention to me.  
“Kid. ‘Nic, you’re up. That’s good.” Metallica is about as flustered as he can be, although it’s barely visible, so you’d never guess it. “How long was I out?” Metallica has ran away, probably to do something or get someone from medical. It’s Tricks who answers my question. “You’ve slept for about a day. Our personnel have declared all of the drug they used out of your system, with no permanent effects.” I’m relieved, for a second.  
“Where’s Tartarus,” I ask. “Or my team?” Tricks is by my side by now, I think he’s cleaning something. “Sorry if I made a mess,” I tack on. Mystify has gone off somewhere else.  
“You’ve sustained injuries,” Tricks utters, and makes a show of getting a blanket they then put on me. “You should sleep more.” I’m not buying that, and I glare at them to stress my point.  
“Fine, you stubborn fool. I’ll speak, just cease your glaring.” They change position to sit next to me. “Tartarus is currently… ah.. detaining your kidnappers as we speak. Unit 13 all joined him part way in, thankfully he was invisible so they didn’t see him, and seemed incredibly annoyed. I have a feeling they are going to want to see you when you get back.”  
“Thanks, then,” I replied. “Is anybody hurt, other than me?” Tricks’ brain seems to stutter a minute as he processes my question. They stare at me from where they sit by my head.  
“You… you are peculiar indeed. Nobody is hurt to my knowledge, though Sonata and Com seemed to have taken a hit to their prides. No other injuries reported, except for the broken wrist, impressive bruises, and sprained ribs you possess.” We talk a bit more before Tricks asks me if I’d like to go home. I agree, and thank them. I know for a fact that Tricks will be fast, and probably just teleport me back.  
~~~~~~~~~  
“You’re welcome.” Tricks’ magic is a wonder, really, as I’m home in seconds. A simple touch and an incantation and, presto, I’m in my bed with Tricks beside it. “Are you going to leave,” I say, already on the edge of unconsciousness. “‘Cause I don’t think I’d like that.”  
“I have to,” Tricks replies. “But I will see you soon.” I fall asleep to his portal, a small tinkling of bells the only thing left behind. I think Unit 13’ll get back in a couple hours, so I use the time I have left to sleep some more. When I wake up, as predicted, a couple hours later, unit 13 is back. Renata and Roger are in the kitchen when I choose to saunter down, sipping tea. They both seem to be on edge, Roger visibly more so than Renata, though it’s clear to me she’s just as. Will, Hero and Elphie are all eating and seem stressed. Com, edgy as ever, is brooding by the counter while sipping coffee. Everybody is in mission gear, so I know they’ve only recently come back. They look up when I enter.  
“I… was this some sick joke, ‘Nic?!?” I baulk, and freeze with my hands on the coffee pot and a mug. Since when was Cap so upset? Well.. I can see why he’d be angry.  
“Friend ‘Nic,” booms Hero, a joyous tone present. “Glad you have returned!” I nod to him in response.  
“Котенок.“ Renata only uses that name when she’s feeling strong emotions and willing to express them. Usually I can tell which emotion, but now it’s unreadable. Definitely off-putting.  
“I’m sorry, but what did I do? I disappeared but.. Is this my fault? Do you all blame me?” I’m ashamed, and indignant, and a whole assortment of emotions I don’t want to be feeling.  
“Котенок, that’s not what we mean. We are angry, yes, but not at you.” Hero cuts in with, “Indeed, we are justly angry at Director Gore, who kept your kidnap from us.” Renata finished by sniping Cap with; “Roger just did not know how to deal with his anger, it seems.” Roger shot her a betrayed look, followed by an indignant one. She ignored him.  
“I wasn’t aware of much,” I say, willing to offer an explanation but not sure they’d want me to continue. When nobody stops me, I persevere on. “When I was kidnapped, I mean. I still don’t know a lot about the who or why. I know it was in a warehouse, and it must’ve been close. I would wager it was a terrorist organisation, from the way they handled themselves.” The Villains League is something I asked Tricks about, and they said that they or any other member had not been spotted while rescuing me. I was as relieved then as I am now that it wasn’t something I needed to explain, as it would’ve been difficult to. Roger sighs, “Well, at least you’re safe. I’ll contact Gore with the information we have now, and that’ll be the end of what we’re going to do.” Everybody nods, including me.  
“I’ll.. uh… go contact Con now,” I mutter, and pour myself a cup of coffee. “Bye.” I duck out of the room and head to my ‘shop before they can ask any questions. When I get there, AVES (Another Very Extraordinary System), 5P1R1T, and 1D1OT are there. My AIs. 5P1R1T is running around, trying and failing to control his intangibility and failing, if the path of destruction he’s on was any indicator. 1D1OT is following him, trying and failing to help. AVES is cleaning up after them using robotic arms attached to the ceiling by yours truly. 5P1R1T looks up and sees me. Then he goes looking for a wrench. 1D1OT follows him, his little ball and small head making him bear uncanny resemblance to both BB-8 and R2-D2 from Star Wars. I’m a nerd, ok?!? Anyway-  
“Young sir, you must finish-” AVES is cut off by Bunny’s voice crooning, “Did you sign those papers yet, ‘Niiiiic?” She sounds sweet, drawing the last word out, but I know it’s a trap. “Doing so now, Ms. Bit.” She's coming down the stair to my 'shop, now. “Good. Where were you?” Bunny wastes no time in replying.  
“I was kidnapped, Ms. Bit.” I always reply with a robotic impression in my voice so she can be sure I’m serious. I don’t really expect what I hear in her next question, though. Her, “Are you fully functional,” has a note of concern. Ms. Bit appears at my workshop door in time to question, “Who did it?” I nod my head.  
“I am fully functioning, rest assured. It’s all flesh wounds.” Bunny’s face softens. I’m only twisting the truth a bit, and besides, I’ll heal in a week. Or three… “young sir has a broken wrist, multiple sprained ribs, and an assortment of bruises that is quite magnificent.” AVES! “Hey ‘Nic, would you like to amend your previous statement?” I quickly stammer out “Traitor” to AVES, who is, and make an honest attempt to show Bunny I’m fine while I raise my hands in surrender. “Okay! Okay, traitor here,” I shoot a glare at AVES’ cameras and heave a sigh. “is right. But, really, I’m fine! Totally fine!” I add the inevitable, “or at least I will be” under my breath. Bunny heard it, as she always does. Bunny, never deterred from a chance to mother hen me, calls Com. Com is an equally horrible mother hen, and Betty knows this. She pushes me upstairs and alerts unit 13 to my condition.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
I don’t escape from that mothering session for a weekend. I’m greeted to exactly the same thing at my next game night with the Villains’ League. Thankfully, school is used to this. I’m just given a couple detentions for all my missed absences. All in all, not a bad turn out, considering.

**Author's Note:**

> i posted another one peeps
> 
> i posted another one ;-;
> 
> Anyway enjoy i guess uwu


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